Dance, Music, and Departures

Things have been somewhat quiet on our end – not this past week but the week before was the Staff Talent Show, in which I had a chance to perform. I was involved in two dances: a Holi dance in Kathak style, and part of the end-of-show Bollywood medley. We did well enough – of course I know every single mistake I made, but a week(!) of compliments has at least said that very few other people picked them up.

Additionally, we’ve had some good news and some bad news. Some friends we’ve become rather close to will be departing after only a year – this time, due to an impending childbirth (and a fear of complications). While we can’t blame our friends for wanting to leave, this is the second time in as many years that people we’ve really enjoyed spending time with are departing early. It’s made me a little gun-shy on the effort to develop strong friendships again, if everyone keeps leaving after only a year. We’re happy for them – but sorry to see them leave.

Yesterday down in Dehradun, I managed to acquire heat exhaustion (dehydrated myself) and Adam managed to acquire a pair of drums (tabla); we’ve been discussing their purchase for awhile, and they’ll likely be our last big buy for quite some time. He’s already been playing around with them and watching YouTube videos – we’re hoping he’ll be able to get some classes with the Indian music teacher here on campus, too.

Still – home leave in just shy of a month! We fly first to Connecticut and see family and friends there, and will celebrate our two-year-paperwork anniversary (and my mother & stepfather’s umpteenth wedding anniversary) on the 24th of June. A few days later we fly out to Kansas to see my grandparents, and then up to Toronto for a couple of weeks until making our way back to India. We’ve learned that one of my new-ish friends (a dorm parent who shares my birthday) may be coming to Canada for her first visit, so we might try to drag her from Mississauga up to Toronto for a day or two and show her some of the sights.

As far as the next school year, it looks as if Adam will be teaching Grade 7 mathematics again, as well as Grade 10 and 12 English. We’re going to see about getting some PD (Professional Development) approved for him; all the new English teachers are getting AP training in the US before they leave, and he still hasn’t had any – so we’re hoping they’ll approve the online course, plus a workshop for poetry (also online), and see about more of the JUMP Math online PD.

As for myself… I’m already being roped into more dance things – evidently a latent skill I’d left alone after ballet years and years ago. Sounds like there’s something being planned for Independence Day, and I’m going to be in on it..!

Annaprashan

On Thursday, I was privileged to be invited by a friend to her daughter’s annaprashan. An annaprashan/annaprasan is a Hindu ceremony where the baby is offered their first solid food – in this case, it was kheer (a rice-based dish).

It was a very interesting thing to watch – the pandit was the same priest as had come for the Griha Pravesh puja, so there was a moment of him blinking, asking “Wait, is she Hindu?” “No, just curious.” … and again, he made sure I was involved. I had to run out to find a new blank notebook we could use for the ceremony, and he did the tikka-and-prayer thread part of the ceremony while I was gone. When I came back, he made sure that I had the chance to have it done too, if I wished (and I did).

The ceremony itself had certain similarities to the Griha Pravesh puja, namely at the end: the first part was different, and involved worshiping different figures and aspects including, in this case, the 9 planets. There were at least four offerings made – I remember this by the fruits used (an orange, an apricot, a mango and an apple).

The similarities with the Griha Pravesh puja were next: pandit-ji and my friend’s brother built it (that’s when Adam should have been there..!), and some ghee was mixed with a special type of earth (rather like a mulch, in fact) and then put into small bowls, and from there we tossed small pinches (using thumb and the fourth finger) into the fire. After that, back to the variations. First, Nitya was given the chance to touch an object, as a foretelling/hope for her future: she ended up touching a book, which is a sign of learning. Initially, she wasn’t really keen on touching anything at all! the baby was offered her kheer by various members of the close and extended family (myself included), and after that was the aarti, and then done!

Afterwards was a luncheon, for those who couldn’t make the puja (they must be done on certain auspicious days, and at appropriate times; also to coordinate with the priest’s schedule). Adam came in after teaching class and got to have lunch with us, and then we headed back to the school!

Darcey, Vimmi, Upasini, Vandana and Uma at lunch.

Hell Week (Woodstock Version)

The past week at Woodstock has been… eventful, and this coming week promises equal excitement, but hopefully of a more positive nature. A (now former) staff spouse posted something somewhat incendiary on a blog as the spouse and family were preparing for an early departure, and it consumed the school in gossip and – unfortunately – incited some students to internet trolling. It’s caused a large number of hurt feelings for various members of the community, including the students. I have to look at this as positively as I can – a learning experience for everyone involved on the things one should and should not do – and hope this is avoided in the future. It’s also continued to inspire me towards doing intercultural here at Woodstock, one way or another.

Additionally, a friend’s parents visited, and Adam and I went over – we had the chance for Japanese food, ranging from green tea “jello” with red bean paste sauce, to panko-breaded chicken, veg soup with sake, roll-your-own-sushi (with cucumber, tofu and pressed crab), and bee larvae.

Yes, bee larvae. We tried some of that, too. The conclusion: soya-flavoured oatmeal.

The next night, we went to another friends’ house for a dinner party, and there’s a story That Shall Not Ever Be Repeated – which, of course, means it was a fun night. We got to try some rhododendron wine, which smelled much more alcoholic than it tasted – it tasted like a very fruity wine-juice (which Adam liked…!), smelled much more like wine, and clearly we have to find some and bring it back. This stuff had come from Himachal Pradesh (a state northwest of us), and I’m going to have to keep eyes and ears out for anyone going that way in the future.

This week is full of late nights. Last night (Tuesday) was the first of the internal exams – we got home shortly after 9pm. Tonight is extended study hall with Adam’s grade 7s, and then Thursday… panic, for the talent show!… Plus another late night internal exam. so we will be home late those nights. Additionally, I have dance rehearsals during the day (had one Monday, have another today after lunch), plus one was  4-7 on Monday, and then 5-7 on Tuesday. Wednesday (today) is the A/V or technical rehearsal for the talent show, and Thursday and Friday are the performances. The likelihood we’ll be home any night before 9 is pretty slim – we cooked dinner at home Monday, and won’t again until Saturday. The rest: school food, because there’s simply no way to manage cooking at that hour, and getting up the next morning having had reasonable sleep.

Possibly on Saturday we’ll be going up to Landour Language School to do some photography for their anniversary event; we won’t see ‘normal’ again until next Sunday… if even then!

Pantry Challenge Update

So far, slow but steady… using up things like Nutrela (dehydrated soy… things), corn kernels for popcorn, prepackaged popcorn for the pressure cooker, rice (oh, always the rice!), atta (wheat flour), oatmeal, etc. This week was a focus on Indian & Mexican to use up some of that rice, corn flour, and wheat flour. Next week will be rice & pasta… for the three whole days I’m cooking dinner at home and not eating at school. In the event we do eat at home any of those nights (school dinner being dreadful), I’m planning on: Old El Paso Tortilla Stuffer + homemade rotilla (roti-tortilla hybrids) and leftovers.

• 29th: butter chicken with veg (probably aloo gobi), rice & roti
• 30th: chicken with creamy garlic sauce & pasta/garlic
• 1st: eating at school – Kathak practice for talent show + exams
• 2nd: eating at school – technical rehearsal for talent show + math extra help
• 3rd: eating at school – talent show performance for Jr School + exams
• 4th: eating at school – talent show performance for Sr School
• 5th: basic lemon & herb roast chicken with veg and rice, the carcass to be recycled next week into soups, sandwiches, or Indian food.

The days of the talent show, I’ll be exhausted and not want to cook – and we won’t be home til after 8:30 or 9:00pm anyway… easier to eat at school (dinner is 5:30-6:30 there).

I took the giant can of clam chowder out and have been using it as lunch/snacks during this week – it’s concentrated(!) so I have had a lot of it… but I’ve eaten lunch at home 3-4 days of the week, and so the chowder plus bread has worked well. Very classy when I also use it as my chance to drink raspberry lemonade that came from my mom in packets, too. However, I’m not certain we’ll even have to place a grocery order this week, unless it’s just for milk, orange juice, and mangoes… for mango season is upon us! I’ve been ordering two at a go, eating one and freezing the other, and taking out the frozen ones to thaw to add to things. I think adding it to my breakfast oatmeal/cereal is the next step, I’ll just have to thaw the frozen ones out overnight.

I’ve realised I need to debate on whether or not I can hold onto, or if I should use up, the container full of packages of… stuff. There’s Lipton chicken soup mix, Ranch dressing mix, Swiss Miss hot cocoa, and a few other things. I know that the Pantry Challenge’s goal is to use everything up — but those are things you simply cannot find here in India, and my gut instinct is to hoard them until I really want them, instead of using them for the sake of using them to complete the challenge. Some of the imported goods (like beef boullion) are that way as well – that’s just something you cannot find here, full stop. I don’t want to use up my carefully hoarded cubes just for the sake of the challenge – I don’t ever know when I’ll get them again, and their cost in the USA/Canada is prohibitive for our budget when we go back on home leave. The raise doesn’t kick in til the paycheque…when we return at the end of July.

Some other recipe ideas I’m throwing around: jambalaya (bye, rice!), daal (at least once a week, especially the ones that call for 6 red chillis, to use those up!), and palak paneer, shahi paneer, and their ilk (I have frozen paneer). About a month ago, Adam and I drafted up a Google Docs spreadsheet with the different meals we usually rotate in and out, so I’m going through that and make sure I can add extras to it – or create appropriate sides with variation. Daal once a week? Okay. I want 4-8 different daal recipes, so we don’t get dead tired of one.

 

 

Tips for a Successful Adaptation + More Dance!

These crossed my mind after Adam told me he & another staffer had been discussing successful adaptations to Woodstock/India, and especially staff spouse adjustments… so I started to think about what exactly it is that I’ve been doing that have really helped me.

• Look for something you’ve never done before, but wanted to – or you’re not sure you wanted to do – and find an opportunity for it. Here in India, I’ve had opportunities to learn two different types of classical dance (Kathak, and on Wednesday I’ll be attending a Kuchipudi master class); I never would have found them if I hadn’t pushed myself and tried. I also never would have thought I could enjoy dance this much!
• Look for an opportunity to share a skill you have with others. I’ve been tutoring ESL – despite the fact that I have no training as a teacher, nor do I really want to ever be a teacher in my lifetime – and I’ve made lots of friends and connections through it. It’s also a reason to go up on campus, interact with people, and do some personal professional development.
• Take time for yourself: don’t force yourself to be inundated with the culture every day. I’ve found that taking a day every couple of weeks not to go into the bazaar—or even to the school— has helped me keep myself grounded and not feel as if I’m drowning. I also think our decision to *not* have an ayah has really helped us, because while we’re not getting in-the-house Hindi exposure, we’re also not suffering some of the cultural hiccups and stresses I’ve heard other people dealing with (theft, clothes being damaged or ruined, damaged electronics, etc).
• Be open-minded: don’t think your home country/culture is the Best Place Ever. We joke that I’m a terrible American for a variety of reasons – so maybe it helps that I never thought the US was the best place on Earth. Acknowledge that there are cultural differences, and that you won’t be able to do everything just like you did back home – and that there are certain things which may be better than where you came from. It could be healthier food options, clothing, or cultural aspects – while women still struggle here in India at times, the women’s-only metro cars in Delhi are certainly a benefit! There are things Adam and I both miss – but there are some amazing things India has that America and Canada don’t have, and might never, and if I kept pining for “the best place ever”, I’d never want to get out and experience them, or be open-minded enough to do so.
• Look at it as an opportunity for re-invention. No one here except my husband knows about my life before Woodstock, or only as much as I wish to share. If someone has always been labelled as the bookish introvert, now you can change that view – if you want to. If you’ve been pushed to be outgoing and would rather just sit at home or in a park and read – you have that opportunity, too. You are what you want to be, what you want to make yourself – and no one has any preconceived notions about you as a person (though perhaps stereotypes will exist), so you can live up to stereotypes or choose to avoid them.

Additionally, here are some pictures from the Kuchipudi dance performance last night. Performing were: Srimati Bala Kondala Rao (the premiere Kuchipudi guru in the form), her son Aditya Bulli Brahmam, and Woodstock’s own Dr. Roxanne Gupta (who has been studying Kuchipudi for over 20 years).

Go Woodstock!

Today I went to my… third ever basketball game (I remember going to one in high school, and then one of Ashtha’s games on Thursday, then the semifinals today). Basketball’s never been my thing, but Adam & I went to support our “kid” (we have her on co-share with her mom), and I got some pretty good photos… but more importantly, I also got to see how excellent the Woodstock students are with their ethics.

The team they were against, Modern School from Delhi, was… not particularly modern – pinching (hard to see mid-game!), pushing, and just generally poor sportsmanship. Some of their players were amazing – I can’t deny that – but their unsportsmanlike conduct really ruined some of the enjoyment for me. The Woodstock girls don’t play very aggressively – whether you consider that a flaw or a virtue – but there were significantly fewer calls for physical-contact matters against our girls than against their opponents.

Woodstock’s girls played well – some great three-point shots, and some good right-at-the-net plays. Even when they were frustrated that the referees weren’t calling on some of the clear fouls, they kept playing – and I think the physical contact being made so regularly and so egregiously (and so sneaky, as appropriate) was disheartening for them. At the same time, the girls kept up their efforts and didn’t ever give up – even when Modern got ahead, they kept pushing themselves.

This is our kid. Doesn't she look just like Adam & I?

When the time comes and all these girls have graduated from school, the Modern students are likely to be the ones who kick, stamp, and crush everyone beneath them, making few friends, and oing what they have to in order to win. The Woodstock kids… I think they’ll be the ones who stop, talk about what can be done to fix things, and then proceed to help others up after they’ve been trampled. The Woodstock alums will be the ones who do the right thing, no matter what the cost to themselves — and the others are the ones who have to win, whether or not they do it ethically, responsibly, or appropriately.

I’m not a Woodstock teacher, I’m not a Woodstock alum, student, parent, or anything – but the girls today did well, and I’m proud of them, because they showed that Woodstock students do the right thing – not the expedient one.

Five Things Not To Do At Once…

 

1. Sign up to not only perform a kathak routine, but participate in a Bollywood dance routine as well.
2. Try a new recipe for the first time when you’re starving. Protip: dried rajmah daal (aka kidney beans) take more than 6-12 hours to rehydrate *and* cook down. I was trying to make refried beans with them, and… it went poorly. After soaking for 2 days, and having been cooked for 4+ hours, they were still closer to “rock hard” than “mushy”.
3. Attempt to coordinate a 4 week vacation with four separate plane flights involved, seeing people one hasn’t seen in 1-2+ years.
4. Help your husband mark papers and prep for exams – it just ends up in hair-pulling and frustration, for all parties involved. High expectations, and partial sentences on both ends lead to mistakes being made.
5. Have construction going on right outside your bedroom window, involving dumping loads of rocks down a corrugated tin chute at 2:30am.
6. (bonus!) get excited about something, buy a video & download an app, only to find out that you cannot view the video because you’re not in the continental United States or Canada, and that you can’t get the video out of the app so you can use it elsewhere.

I’m sure I could add to this, but that’s rather an encapsulation of my life, and Adam’s tucked in too, at the moment. Except he’s not trying to do the dance routines… add in “remember to exercise” and “get all papers marked” there. The Pantry Challenge has gone pretty well, except for the rajmah daal incident – using up some of the corn flour we have for tortillas (mixing it with atta), rice, etc. for tortillas. Last night was garlic chicken in cream sauce over spinach pasta; tonight one of my students is bringing us dinner, so I have no idea what there will be!